Longing for Reconciliation: A Challenge for Women with Borderline Personality Disorder

Abstract

The aim of this study was to explore the way in which traumatic childhood experiences influenced the daily life of women with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). An explorative design comprising in-depth interviews and a qualitative content analysis was used. The findings revealed one main theme-Longing for Reconciliation-comprising two themes: (1) Living with a sense of shame and guilt and (2) Struggling to be released from a sense of being trapped. Longing for reconciliation influenced the women's daily life as well as their search for the meaning of traumatic childhood experiences. New meaning can emerge through change, forgiveness, and reconciliation, thus helping women with BPD overcome their struggle and gain the insight and strength to look into their secret knowledge. Meaning can emerge and help them to develop an empathic understanding of themselves in the context of past and present relationships.

A hermeneutic approach to the characteristics of mental health nursing practice

“…In this stage, findings from the doctoral thesis by Holm (2009) based on four empirical articles (Holm & Severinsson 2008, 2010, Holm et al . 2009a,b) were used.…”

“…The patients' problem with intimacy can be seen as vulnerability that implies a relational struggle that increased their panic of being intruded upon (Holm & Severinsson 2010). Their language included symbols and metaphors that expressed their experiences of emotional pain (Holm et al . 2009b, Holm & Severinsson 2010).…”

“…This responsibility seemed to force them to live up to a tough image and led to a feeling of exclusion, but also to emotional relief and a sense of freedom, which meant that they felt responsible for their own actions and how they existed in the world (Holm 2009). Searching for meaning can be a daily struggle characterized by existential questions such as: ‘Why me?’ (Holm et al . 2009b).…”

“…Persons who suffer from emotional pain are desperate and distressed because they experience having failed in their responsibility as human beings (Holm 2009). Moral conflicts are often overwhelming, leading to unbearable guilt and shame (Holm et al . 2009a,b).…”

Personality Patterns and Forgiveness Among University Students in Ardabil, Iran

“…The most important characteristics of borderline personality disorder are the persistent problems in emotion regulation, impulse control, and instability of interpersonal relationships and self-image (24). These people have difficulty in forgiving and loving themselves and expressing hatred, hostility, fear, and anger (24); therefore, the increased tendency to reconciliation is recommended in patients with borderline personality disorder as a way to finding meaning for traumatic childhood experiences and creating sympathetic insight and forgiving oneself and others (25). Dichotomous thinking is one of the problematic factors in interpersonal relationship in these patients (21); hence, it is likely that individuals with high scores in borderline personality pattern, when facing violations of others, shift them from the good side to the bad side of their thinking and feel hatred toward them and consequently tend to show less forgiveness.…”