The risk of devastating wildfires – exacerbated by climate change – poses a threat to urban areas worldwide. There is a pressing need to strengthen societal efforts to coexist with this perturbation by creating resilient social-ecological systems. To enable this, a significant social-ecological transformation of wildfire-prone regions seems to be required. Here, I reflect on my experience in three projects of participatory wildfire governance conducted in the Barcelona Metropolitan Region (Spain) during the last 18 years. The goal is to learn from the experience and to sketch new transformative options to coexist with wildfire. After a literature review on the links between resilience to wildfire, adaptation and transformation, I analyse these projects with regard to their achievements, challenges and potential new transformative avenues. The analysis shows the crucial role that a locally rooted civil society can have when it is able to network with key agencies and actors over the long term. It also shows the importance of developing integrative wildfire planning networks where different ecosystem services and values are considered in successive phases of public deliberation between actors, citizens and wildfire managers. It is concluded that deepening the transdisciplinary content of participatory wildfire governance can increase its transformative potential.