Spalling, a common failure mechanism of gear systems, greatly affects the dynamics of gears operation, which is reflected in the time-varying mesh stiffness (TVMS). Current TVMS models often overestimate the asymmetric spalling phenomenon and may lead to inaccuracy in identifying and predicting the spalling failure. To address this problem, in this paper, a new stiffness, namely torsional stiffness, is introduced to quantify the effect of asymmetric spalling defects, and an equivalent stiffness calculation method for different asymmetric shapes is proposed. Based on this, a shape-independent TVMS model is constructed, which can realize the fast calculation of TVMS for spalling defects with different shapes at arbitrary asymmetric locations. Furthermore, a FEM-based validation method is developed by considering diverse loading states and improving the current result extraction method. Case studies are presented to illustrate the proposed model and to analyze the effects of different types of asymmetric spalling defects on gear dynamics. The FEM validation has shown that the proposed model has a good effectiveness.