Chemical warfare agents (CWAs) are among the most lethal chemicals known to humans. Thus, developing multifunctional catalysts for highly efficient detoxification of various CWAs is of great importance. In this work, we developed a robust copper tetrazolate metal−organic framework (MOF) catalyst containing a dicopper unit similar to the coordination geometry of the active sites of natural phosphatase and tyrosinase enzymes. This catalyst aided in phosphate ester bond hydrolysis and hydrogen peroxide decomposition, ultimately achieving high detoxification efficiency against both a nerve agent simulant (diethoxy-phosphoryl cyanide (DECP)) with a half-life of 3.5 min and a sulfur mustard simulant (2-chloroethyl ethyl sulfide (CEES)) with a half-life of 4.5 min, making it competitive with other reported materials. The dicopper sites in ZZU-282 provide versatile binding modes with the substrates, thereby promoting the activation of substrates and enhancing the catalytic efficiency. A combination of postmodified metal exchange control experiments, density functional theory calculations, and catalytic evaluations confirmed that dual Cu sites are the active centers promoting the catalytic reaction. This study offers a new design perspective to achieve advanced catalysts for CWA detoxification.