DETR is a novel end-to-end transformer architecture object detector, which significantly outperforms classic detectors when scaling up the model size. In this paper, we focus on the compression of DETR with knowledge distillation. While knowledge distillation has been well-studied in classic detectors, there is a lack of researches on how to make it work effectively on DETR. We first provide experimental and theoretical analysis to point out that the main challenge in DETR distillation is the lack of consistent distillation points. Distillation points refer to the corresponding inputs of the predictions for student to mimic, and reliable distillation requires sufficient distillation points which are consistent between teacher and student. Based on this observation, we propose a general knowledge distillation paradigm for DETR(KD-DETR) with consistent distillation points sampling. Specifically, we decouple detection and distillation tasks by introducing a set of specialized object queries to construct distillation points. In this paradigm, we further propose a general-to-specific distillation points sampling strategy to explore the extensibility of KD-DETR. Extensive experiments on different DETR architectures with various scales of backbones and transformer layers validate the effectiveness and generalization of KD-DETR. KD-DETR boosts the performance of DAB-DETR with ResNet-18 and ResNet-50 backbone to 41.4%, 45.7% mAP, respectively, which are 5.2%, 3.5% higher than the baseline, and ResNet-50 even surpasses the teacher model by 2.2%.