Facing fear without losing face: Working with Asian American men.

Abstract

helped shaped my view of masculinity: my father, who took a risk to move his family to the United States, and my mother, who was the breadwinner but adhered faithfully to her ascribed cultural role to comply with the patriarch's decisions.It is not surprising that themes of leadership, decision making, and importance of the family provided an overall framework in my perception of masculinity. At the same time, values of limiting emotional expression or display, authoritarianism, and sexism also contributed to this foundation. And one value, above all, was given particular attention: Do not disgrace the family; in other words, do not "lose face." This value, "face," has shown to be a consistent and salient variable in Asian American help-seeking preferences and attitudes (Park & Zane, 2005;Zane & Mak, 2003;Zane & Yeh, 2002). Face is differentiated from shame in that the former is a social and relational construct (Goffman, 1955), whereas the latter is an individually based experience (Ho, 1976). My identity development, influenced by these values and their conflict with my own values, shaped my early years as an adult. I went through a process of appreciating and resenting my culture, which for many years resulted in stagnant identity development. Perhaps this is one way Asian cultures maintain a sense of harmony: Love and dislike balance each other out. But my definition of what it means to be an Asian man did eventually grow through this constant struggle. My movement from culture-bound "harmony" to a path of self-defined harmony was set when I chose the field of psychology and confronted the "shame" that resulted from this decision. Yet in making this difficult choice, I had never felt more like a man, an honorable Asian man, than in those moments of personal struggle-to me, this was harmony. I realized, and continue to realize, that masculinity and "maleness" mean achieving a sense of comfort with the "discomfort" of periodic straying from culture-and gender-bound norms and stereotypes. "Comfort with discomfort"-this is strength, achievement, and sensitivity; I believe this is the contemporary Asian man.Along with my family, there are a great many influences in my personal and professional journey in the area of working with men. My academic and professional mentors have played major roles in providing a theoretical foundation from which my clinical work, and work with men, are applied. The pioneering work of Stanley Sue and other Asian American researchers provided not only valuable empirical information about personality characteristics, cultural values, and counseling issues with Asian Americans but also revealed that Asian American men were successful in the field of psychology (seeUba, 1994).My orientation as a therapist is influenced heavily by the humanistic, interpersonal process, dynamic, and experiential schools of psychology. Although trained primarily as a cognitive-behaviorist, the humanistic work of Carl Rogers's (1951) and Edward Teyber's (2000) interpersonal process approach present what I fee...

Understanding Distress

“…Past studies have shown face concern to be related to lower self-disclosure (Zane et al, 1998) and preference for directive counseling approach (Chou, 2000;Park, 1999). Thus counselors should be prepared to work at least initially in a more directive counseling style and establish credibility and trust with clients through culturally sensitive techniques such as gift giving and assertion of an authority role (Park, 2006;Sue & Zane, 1987). In the communication of presenting problems, coping methods, and treatment goal expectations, cognitive match is particularly important in treatment retention and outcomes (Zane et al, 2005).…”