Incels, or involuntary celibates, represent a sub-section of the manopshere: an informal confederacy of digital communities in which men construct and strengthen anti-feminist/male hegemonic narratives. Inceldom represents a beta masculine identity, with members placing themselves at the bottom of an apparent natural hierarchy of masculinity. Bonded by a shared perception of their sexual inferiority and marginalization, incels are depressed by the perceived permanence of their low status. In extreme cases, this philosophy has been linked to acts of violence and murder. The present study asks how these communities attract young men and perpetuate themselves. It also asks how they can be supported to leave. We conducted in-depth interviews with nine ex-incels to study why they joined incel communities, stayed in them, and later left. We identify six key themes, representing key stages across their journey in and out of inceldom: i) involuntary celibacy without inceldom; ii) “fucked by the world”; iii) failing with women/failing at life; iv) a safe space; v) leaving: a process, not an event; and vi) residue. Each is defined and discussed. Combined, they chart a composite trajectory for many young men who may be vulnerable to radicalization.