The integration of electronic functionalities into textiles has been under extensive research as its application is witnessed in various fields, including sensing, energy generation, storage, displays, and interfaces. Textiles endowed with flexibility, comfort, lightweight, and washability have been tested as reliable base materials to implement various physical sensors, of which strain and pressure sensors have shown great potential in applications such as healthcare, fitness tracking, and human-machine interaction. Piezoresistive physical sensors have considerable advantages over capacitive and piezoelectric sensors made of textiles. Apart from fibers, yarns, and threads, two-dimensional textile stripes occupy a significant share as substrates in these sensors. This review article discusses the recent progress of 2D textile-based piezoresistive strain and pressure sensors. It covers the latest works in this domain, focusing on different textile choices, conductive material combinations, fabrication methods, additional functionalities like heating, features like hydrophobic properties, and various applications, with tabulations of key performance metrics. For researchers seeking an update on the state of the field, this review would be helpful as it offers insights into trends for further research and product development aimed at meeting the demands of advanced healthcare and other applications.