Small-molecule drugs have been employed for years as therapeutics in the pharmaceutical industry. However, small-molecule drugs typically have short in vivo half-lives which is one of the largest impediments to the success of many potentially valuable pharmacologically active small molecules. The undesirable pharmacokinetics and pharmacology associated with some small molecules have led to the development of a new class of bioconjugates known as chemically programmed antibodies (cPAbs). cPAbs are bioconjugates in which antibodies are used to augment small molecules with effector functions and prolonged pharmacokinetic profiles, where the pharmacophore of the small molecule is harnessed for target binding and therefore biological targeting. Many different small molecules can be conjugated to large proteins such as full monoclonal antibodies (IgG), fragment crystallizable regions (Fc), or fragment antigen binding regions (Fab). In order to successfully and site-specifically conjugate small molecules to any class of antibodies (IgG, Fc, or Fab), the molecules must be derivatized with a functional group for ease of conjugation without altering the pharmacology of the small molecules. In this Review, we summarize the different synthetic or biological methods that have been employed to produce cPAbs. These unique chemistries have potential to be applied to other fields of antibody modification such as antibody drug conjugates, radioimmunoconjugates, and fluorophore-tagged antibodies.