‘I am busy independent woman who has sense of humor, caring about others’: older adults’ self-representations in online dating profiles

Abstract

Similar to their younger counterparts, older adults (age 60+) are increasingly turning to online dating sites to find potential romantic and sexual partners. In this paper, we draw upon qualitative data from a thematic analysis of 320 randomly selected online dating profiles posted by Canadian heterosexual older adults who self-identified as Asian, Black, Caucasian or Native American. In particular, we examined how the older adults’ self-presentations varied according to race/ethnicity, age and gender, and how the language they used to describe themselves and their preferred potential partners reflected and reinforced idealised images of ageing. Our analysis identified five primary ways in which the older adults portrayed themselves. They depicted themselves as active and busy with cultural/artistic, social and adventurous activities; and also as physically healthy and intellectually engaged. Third, they emphasised the ways in which they were productive through work and volunteer activities. Fourth, they accentuated their positive approach to life, identifying themselves as happy, fun-loving and humorous individuals. Finally, they highlighted their personable characteristics, portraying themselves as trustworthy and caring. We discuss our findings with a particular focus on gender differences, drawing on literature on masculinity and femininity, and also look at capital and power relations by considering the online dating setting as a field in the Bourdieusian sense.

Love in Cyberspace: Self Presentation and Partner Seeking in Online Dating Advertisements of Older Adults

“…As with many studies on online dating in later life, wanting a companion was important to the participants in the current study and supported the desire for companionship (i.e., friendship) for women in the studies by Vandeweerd (2016) and Menkin et al (2015), and for men and women in the studies by McWilliams and Barrett (2013) and Wada et al (2019). In the current study, participants often described themselves as fun-loving and as someone who enjoys life.…”

“…Research on the experiences of older adults and online dating has focused on topics such as the positive and negative experiences of online dating (Vandeweerd et al, 2016), self-presentation in dating ads (Davis & Fingerman, 2016; McWilliams & Barrett, 2013; Wada et al, 2019; Wada et al, 2016;), and what older online daters are seeking in partner (Alterovitz & Mendelsohn, 2009, 2013; McIntosh et al, 2011; Menkin, et al 2015). These approaches to the research are examined further.…”

“…Using the same sample as described earlier, Wada et al (2019) focused on self-presentations of people posting online dating ads and “how the language they used to describe themselves and their preferred potential partners reflected and reinforced idealised images of ageing” (p. 951). These older adults presented themselves as active, healthy, productive, positive, and personable.…”

Designing the Lost Self

“…There is very little research exploring the use of online selfrepresentations by older adults. Recent research on selfrepresentations of older adults in dating sites (where users are searching for a potential partner) suggest that they depict themselves as being active, productive, healthy, accentuating their positive approach to life [50]. These portrayals are made by older adults using static elements such as nicknames, slogans and photographs to highlight a positive image in relation to their age, finding that suggests that this may be a way to override negative stereotypes attached to older age [50].…”

“…This is one example that challenges stereotypes of older adults using technology. Like Craig, other older adults are using social media [1], online communities [7,8,25], dating sites [50], and games [1,28]. In fact, recent reports indicate that the fastest growing segment of the online gaming population new to games is older adults over 65 years of age [5].…”