The secular evolution of disk galaxies is largely driven by resonances between the orbits of “particles” (stars or dark matter) and the rotation of non-axisymmetric features (spiral arms or a bar). Such resonances may also explain kinematic and photometric features observed in the Milky Way and external galaxies. In simplified cases, these resonant interactions are well understood: for instance, the dynamics of a test particle trapped near a resonance of a steadily rotating bar is easily analyzed using the angle-action tools pioneered by Binney, Monari, and others. However, such treatments do not address the stochasticity and messiness inherent to real galaxies—effects that have, with few exceptions, been previously explored only with complex N-body simulations. In this paper, we propose a simple kinetic equation describing the distribution function of particles near an orbital resonance with a rigidly rotating bar, allowing for diffusion of the particles’ slow actions. We solve this equation for various values of the dimensionless diffusion strength Δ, and then apply our theory to the calculation of bar–halo dynamical friction. For Δ = 0, we recover the classic result of Tremaine and Weinberg that friction ultimately vanishes, owing to the phase mixing of resonant orbits. However, for Δ > 0, we find that diffusion suppresses phase mixing, leading to a finite torque. Our results suggest that stochasticity—be it physical or numerical—tends to increase bar–halo friction, and that bars in cosmological simulations might experience significant artificial slowdown, even if the numerical two-body relaxation time is much longer than a Hubble time.