Patterns and Processes of Intergenerational Estrangement: A Qualitative Study of Mother–Adult Child Relationships Across Time

Abstract

Drawing from the life course perspective, we explored patterns of estrangement between mothers and their adult children across time, and the processes through which these ties remained estranged, or moved in or out of estrangement. We used a prospective design in which data were collected in face-to-face semi-structured interviews with 61 older mothers about their relationships with their 274 adult children at two time points 7 years apart. We began by examining the patterns of stability and change in intergenerational estrangement and identified movement in and out of estrangement across time. Qualitative analyses of the processes underlying estrangement revealed that movement in and out of estrangement reflected nuanced changes in contact and closeness over time rather than abrupt changes resulting from recent transitions in either mothers’ or children’s lives. Taken together, these findings illustrate the complexity of patterns and processes of intergenerational estrangement in later-life families.

Trajectories of Intergenerational Emotional Closeness in Multi-Child Aging Families in China

“…This trajectory of IEC, named as “increasingly tight-knit”, accounted for more than 90% of sampled Chinese multi-child families. Different from what most Western studies concluded as stability of parent-child relationships in late life (Gilligan et al, 2022; Hogerbrugge & Silverstein, 2015; Schenk & Dykstra, 2012; Suitor et al, 2013), we observed an overall upward trend of collective IEC in the increasingly tight-knit families over the 8-year period in the Chinese context. The prevalence of such families aligns with the deeply rooted Chinese cultural value expressed in the proverb “Jia He Wan Shi Xing (家和万事兴),” meaning that a harmonious family cultivates prosperity.…”

“…Congruent with the perspective of collective ambivalence, in these families, older parents tended to have close affections with some specific children but becoming very estranged from the others. Similar to what Gilligan et al (2022) found in the Western families, the estranged and poor intergenerational relationships tended to continue for years. Such differentiated situation of IEC at the family level worsened gradually, although marginally, over time in Chinese families.…”

“…Nevertheless, the study findings were inconsistent in describing the characteristics of the most-likely stable intergenerational relationships. Some concluded that harmonious and affective intergenerational relationships were least likely to change over time (Hogerbrugge & Silverstein, 2015), while others argued that estranged parent-child relationships tended to continue for years (Gilligan et al, 2022). Research has not reached consensus when taking into account different features of parent-child emotional relationships.…”

“…Experiencing serious health events may not necessarily reconcile parents’ relationships with estranged children. However, it may reinforce parents’ connections with children from whom they received sustained and reliable support in the past (Gilligan et al, 2022). Third, whether and how older adults receive support from children matter for parent-child relationships in later life, especially for Chinese older parents.…”

Sibling estrangement in adulthood

“…Following-up on these considerations and recent research investigating adult parent-child estrangement (see, for example, Arránz Becker & Hank, 2022; Gilligan et al, 2022), the present study thus takes a longitudinal perspective to investigate sibling estrangement in adulthood. We use four waves of data from the German Family Panel (pairfam) to analyze respondents’ estrangement – conceptualized as lack of contact or emotional closeness – from up to four biological and non-biological adult siblings over a period of up to 6 years.…”