This paper combines reflection on my experiences as a public school principal with an analysis of two papers about safety in schools: “School Safety and Violence: Research and Clinical Understandings, Trends and Improvement Strategies” by Jonathan Cohen and “Tipping the Balance: Moving Toward School Safety While Considering Student Needs” by Nancy Rappaport. Cohen and Rappaport offer sound guidance on how to make schools safe—from macro system reforms to more micro, interpersonal interactions. I agree with Cohen's assertion that “learning how to have constructive controversial conversations is an essential foundation for healthy relationships on the one hand and democracy on the other.” Indeed, I believe that safe schools are necessarily democratic schools. And I strongly agree with Rappaport's assertion that we must “make learning deeply personal.” Just as important and true is the assertion conveyed by both Rappaport and Cohen that educators must be attuned to environmental conditions in the society—contemporary and historical—that erode safety in school communities, from systemic racism to pandemics and other threats to the wellbeing of children and families. My critique of both papers, and of many social‐emotional school reform efforts in general, is that there is not enough emphasis on the place where students and teachers spend the majority of their time: the classroom. The teaching and learning that happen in the classroom—both what is taught and how it is taught—are dominant forces in determining whether a school is healthy and safe. Drawing from my own work as a teacher and principal, I describe several essential ingredients for curriculum and pedagogy that enable classrooms to be places of trust, healthy risk‐taking, empathy, democratic practice and, ultimately, safety.