Multifunctional, monodisperse, and hyperbranched poly(p-phenyl ester) phenol (HPPEP) colloids are prepared using commercially available inexpensive monomers (i.e., terephthaloyl chloride (A 2 ) and phloroglucinol (B 3 )) via a simple condensation polymerization reaction (A 2 + B 3 ) at room temperature. Because of their symmetrical, rigid, highly branched, and cross-linked structure and the presence of the terminal phenolic units, the formation of highly monodisperse HPPEP colloids (coefficient of variation < 1.6%) can be realized under trimethylamine base conditions without any emulsifier (or surfactants) and expensive catalyst. Owing to their rigid aromatic and cross-linked structure, the HPPEP colloids exhibit excellent thermal, chemical, and mechanical resistances. Furthermore, the phenolic surface groups of HPPEP colloids enable the generation of highly negative surface charges (−60 mV) and catalytic protons (0.26 mmol H + /g) while enhancing surface functionality by chemically binding to red, green, and blue fluorescent dye molecules. Through carbonization, HPPEP colloids can be directly transformed into monodisperse porous carbon spheres with a large surface area (a s,BET = 644.99 m 2 g −1 ). Moreover, the HPPEP colloids can fully decompose into environmentally benign monomers after being exposed to an alkali environment.