Selfobject Experience in Long-Term Friendships of Midlife Women

Abstract

Few psychodynamic thinkers have explored friendship from a selfpsychological perspective. Many have suspected, but this study is the first of its kind to demonstrate through a rigorous qualitative research process that selfobject needs are, in fact, experienced in friendships. This phenomenological study offers an in-depth exploration of how 13 midlife women experienced their long-term friendships. Factors promoting structure building and cohesion strengthening are present in friendships. Learning how one's client approaches friendships can offer clinical insight into selfobject needs, since one's pattern of approaching relationships is enacted in friendships. Offering a psychodynamic understanding of friendship deepens therapeutic understanding of self. KEYWORDS self psychology; life course theory; midlife women; friendship Few psychodynamic thinkers have examined friendship and even fewer have been interested in friendship from a self-psychological perspective. Unconscious processes that ensue in friendships have been largely ignored. When friendships have been considered through a psychodynamic lens, the process has involved observations and experience, not research. Furthermore, literature on the topic has typically focused on psychiatric populations instead of healthy individuals (Galatzer-Levy & Cohler, 1993) while this study involved a non-clinical sample. Long-term friendships are psychologically significant in getting one's needs met and are an important protective factor against negative feeling states, yet little is known about psychodynamic aspects of friendships between midlife women, a population with the highest rate of depression (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 2012). Until this study, there was no research on friendships in midlife women from a psychodynamic perspective, which results in very limited understanding of in-depth processes in this key relationship. The modern depiction of friendship through reality television is infused with conflict (up to 84.67 times per hour according to Coyne, Robinson, and Nelson CONTACT Michelle Piotrowski

Parental narcissistic injury following child acquired brain injury (ABI): Exploring self-object needs and emotional experience.

“…Together, these findings confirm the notion that self-object needs may be transformed in the course of life such as in the aftermath of medical life-altering events (Kohut, 1971;Palombo et al, 2009;Piotrowski, 2018;Smith, 2007). Thus, minimizing of self-object needs, combined with the overall adverse impact of avoiding needs, may pose an adjustment and functioning risk factor for parents after pABI and should be addressed in clinical practice.…”

Friendships, Subjective Age, and Life Satisfaction of Women in Midlife

“…Although electronic communication and social media may have become primary mediums of connection between friends, findings from this study indicate that the more frequently women visit with their friends in face‐to‐face interactions, the higher their levels of life satisfaction and lower their subjective ages. Connections with others in women's lives play an important role as women continue to thrive and grow through friendships (Piotrowski, ), and prioritizing time with friends makes sense. With more support and positivity in life, women may feel inspired (Piotrowski, ), energized, and relieved; therefore, feeling zeal and zest may help them feel subjectively younger as well as enjoy higher levels of life satisfaction.…”

“…Connections with others in women's lives play an important role as women continue to thrive and grow through friendships (Piotrowski, ), and prioritizing time with friends makes sense. With more support and positivity in life, women may feel inspired (Piotrowski, ), energized, and relieved; therefore, feeling zeal and zest may help them feel subjectively younger as well as enjoy higher levels of life satisfaction. Furthermore, the presence of friends can provide support and hope in difficult times; for instance, friendships also serve as a protective factor when family relationships prove difficult (Sherman, Lansford, & Volling, ; Shetty, ).…”

“…Although there is limited research about the role of best friends in midlife, research indicates that best friends can help ease transitions and positively influence emotional well‐being and academic achievement in younger women (Ng‐Knight et al, ). In adulthood, women tend to perceive close friends as family members and report the importance of continuity and reciprocity in their friendships, which support further growth of maturity and therefore a greater sense of confidence (Piotrowski, ), which can enhance overall life satisfaction and well‐being.…”