Sexual communal motivation in couples coping with low sexual interest/arousal: Associations with sexual well-being and sexual goals

Abstract

Women coping with female sexual interest/arousal disorder (FSIAD) report lower sexual and relationship satisfaction compared to healthy controls. In community samples, high sexual communal strength (i.e., the motivation to meet a partner’s sexual needs) is associated with higher sexual desire and satisfaction, but high unmitigated sexual communion (i.e., the prioritization of a partner’s needs to the exclusion of one’s own needs) is associated with lower sexual satisfaction. People higher in sexual communal strength report engaging in sex for approach goals (i.e., to enhance intimacy in their relationship), but not for avoidance goals (i.e., to avert conflict or a partner’s disappointment) and this is one reason why they report greater sexual desire. In the current sample of 97 women diagnosed with FSIAD and their partners we investigated the association between sexual communal strength and unmitigated sexual communion and sexual well-being (i.e., sexual desire, sexual satisfaction and sexual distress) and sexual goals (i.e., approach and avoidance goals). Women who reported higher sexual communal strength were more likely to pursue sex for approach goals and their partner reported greater sexual satisfaction. When partners reported higher sexual communal strength, they reported higher sexual desire, but when they reported higher unmitigated sexual communion, they reported higher sexual distress. Additional associations emerged for couples who engage in sex more (compared to less) frequently. Our findings demonstrate that being motivated to meet a partner’s sexual needs is associated with greater sexual well-being for couples coping with FSIAD, but when this motivation involves neglecting one’s own needs, people do not report greater sexual well-being and instead, partners report higher sexual distress.

The detriments of unmet sexual ideals and buffering effect of sexual communal strength.

“…For example, people higher in sexual communal strength are more understanding and caring when a partner is not in the mood for sex and they tend to feel less resentment in response to a partner declining their sexual advances (see Kim et al, 2018). Even among couples coping with extenuating factors that influence their sexual interests and desire (e.g., transitioning to parenthood; Muise et al, 2017) and those coping with clinical sexual issues (e.g., low sexual desire; Hogue et al, 2019; sexual pain; Muise et al, 2017), when one partner is higher in sexual communal strength, both partners reported higher sexual and relationship satisfaction.…”

Perceived partner sexual responsiveness buffers anxiously attached individuals’ relationship and sexual quality in daily life.

“…Despite this limitation and our concerns with generalizability to more vulnerable couples, we argue that the findings still have implications for family psychologists by highlighting a potential target for clinical interventions aimed at addressing insecurities of anxiously attached people by focusing on how to be more aware of responsiveness, both in the bedroom and in the relationship overall. In fact, other works suggest that having a sexually responsive partner is associated with higher sexual and relationship satisfaction in clinical samples of couples coping with a sexual dysfunction (Hogue et al, 2019; Muise et al, 2017) and can help couples maintain satisfaction even when they have different sexual interests (Balzarini et al, in press; Muise et al, 2017). Future research could explore more vulnerable samples in which people are less satisfied with their relationships and/or sex lives to demonstrate for whom these findings are most valuable and whether the buffering effects are weakened or emphasized in other types of relationships.…”

Women's Sexual Desire, Trauma Exposure, and Posttraumatic Stress Disorder

“…Women with low levels of sexual desire have been found to be more likely than sexually healthy controls to have sex for avoidance‐based reasons, such as wanting to avoid conflict (Bockaj, Rosen & Muise, ), and avoidance has been identified as major aspect of understanding the impact of low desire within couples (Hogue, Rosen, Bockaj, Impett, & Muise, ). Consistently engaging in sex as a means to aid avoidance goals lowers satisfaction for both partners.…”