Shame, Violence, and Morality

Abstract

Shame is most frequently defined as the emotion we feel when we fail to live up to standards, norms, or ideals. I argue that this definition is flawed because it cannot explain some of the most paradigmatic features of shame. Agents often respond to shame with violence, but if shame is the painful feeling of failing to live up to an ideal, this response is unintelligible. I offer a new account of shame that can explain the link between shame and violence. On my view, shame arises out of a tension between our identity and our self‐conception: those things about which we feel shame are part of our identities, but they are not part of our self‐conception. I conclude by arguing that this account of shame is a valuable moral emotion.

The politics of shame in the motivation to virtue: Lessons from the shame, pride, and humility experiences of LGBT conservative Christians and their allies

“…To define shame, we draw from philosophers (Ahmed, 2015;Calhoun, 2004;Shotwell, 2011;Taylor, 1985;Thomason, 2015;Velleman, 2001;), psychologists (H. Lewis, 1971;M. Lewis, 1992;Tompkins, 1995), theologians (Fowler, 1996) and sociologists (Scheff, 2000;Stein, 2006).…”

“…Scholars often initially define shame by distinguishing it from guilt, which is action oriented and more readily fixable. By contrast, shame is person-based and says, 'I am bad' in all or some respects.6 The pain of shame is not just the disappointment of realizing that one is flawed; it is the pain of feeling exposed as flawed in ways that one fears will make important others question one's worthiness for relationship and belonging (Lewis, 1971;Thomason, 2015;Velleman, 2001). People describe the affect of shame as awful, as wanting to hide, 'disappear into the ground,' as having racing and obsessive thoughts about one's failings, which make it difficult to focus on anything else (Karlsson & Sjoberg, 2009).…”

“…Yet even as shame signals desire to withdraw, it simultaneously indicates a longing for acceptance, love, to 'reconstitute the interpersonal bridge' (Ahmed, 2015;Sedgwick, 2003). Shame protects the social bond by reminding us that others' experiences of us matter (Calhoun, 2004;Fowler, 1996;Lewis, 1992;Scheff, 2000;Stein, 2006;Thomason, 2015).…”

“…Shame also often yields psychologically unhealthy responses for those who feel it, including rage or depression (Lewis, 1992). In light of these data, some philosophers defend moral shame more cautiously, arguing that even if feeling shame often does not yield moral improvement, a liability to feel shame retains moral value because it indicates the presence of humility: a person's self-understanding responds to others' experiences of them (Calhoun, 2004, Thomason, 2015.…”

“…Social and cognitive psychologists focusing on the 'moral self' have found links between selfhood and morality using survey or neuroimaging methods (Han, 2017;Han, Chen, Jeong, & Glover, 2016;Hardy & Carlo, 2005;Hardy, Walker, Olsen, Woodbury, & Hickman, 2014;Moll et al, 2007). Similarly, philosophers who link shame and humility treat these as individual properties, not appreciating how social power dynamics can disrupt this link, nor more generally how social power shapes peoples' experiences of and responses to shame in ways that may either support or undercut virtue development (Thomason, 2015).…”