We provide a fine-grained definition of monogamous measure of entanglement that does not invoke any particular monogamy relation. Our definition is given in terms of an equality, as opposed to inequality, that we call the "disentangling condition". We relate our definition to the more traditional one, by showing that it generates standard monogamy relations. We then show that all quantum Markov states satisfy the disentangling condition for any entanglement monotone. In addition, we demonstrate that entanglement monotones that are given in terms of a convex roof extension are monogamous if they are monogamous on pure states, and show that for any quantum state that satisfies the disentangling condition, its entanglement of formation equals the entanglement of assistance. We characterize all bipartite mixed states with this property, and use it to show that the G-concurrence is monogamous. In the case of two qubits, we show that the equality between entanglement of formation and assistance holds if and only if the state is a rank 2 bipartite state that can be expressed as the marginal of a pure 3-qubit state in the W class.Monogamy of entanglement is one of the nonintuitive phenomena of quantum physics that distinguish it from classical physics. Classically, three random bits can be maximally correlated. For example, three coins can be prepared in a state in which with 50% chance all three coins show "head", and with the other 50% chance they all show "tail".