The abused child as parent: Perception of self and other

Abstract

Although not all abused children grow up to be abusive parents, it is well known that people who were severely mistreated by their parents as compared to those who were not are at higher risk for mistreating their children. It has also been shown that abusive parents often have unrealistic expectations for their children—expectations based on distorted perceptions of their children's needs, feelings, and abilities. In this paper, we examine the utility of new methods developed in social psychology to study: (1) the impact of abuse on the structure and content of interpersonal and self‐perception and (2) the interrelationships among an abused mother's social and self‐perception, the quality of her interactions with her child, and the child's development. Case studies will be presented to illustrate how these new methods reflect risk for abuse as predicted independently by clinicians treating the cases.

Being and nonbeing: The existential foundations of the sadistic killer.

“…To complicate matters further, it is well documented that most adult perpetrators of child abuse were once themselves abused as children and this syndrome may emerge as intergenerational (Herzog, Gara, & Rosenburg, 1992; Kaufman & Zigler, 1987; Main & Goldwyn, 1984). Young mothers with a personal history of abuse have difficulty with integration of what counts as acceptable and unacceptable in their past experience.…”

“…Young mothers with a personal history of abuse have difficulty with integration of what counts as acceptable and unacceptable in their past experience. The intergenerationally abused infant therefore once more starts off with confronting a lack—the ability of the previously abused mother to have an adequate conception of her own maternal provenance (Herzog et al, 1992, p. 94). Whereas mothers who have integrated perceptions of themselves as children have less likelihood of abusing their own (Herzog et al, 1992, p. 96), abusive mothers have distorted, negative perceptions of their child—ignoring them, initiating less play and less verbal contact, and being also critical, punitive, and demanding.…”

“…The intergenerationally abused infant therefore once more starts off with confronting a lack—the ability of the previously abused mother to have an adequate conception of her own maternal provenance (Herzog et al, 1992, p. 94). Whereas mothers who have integrated perceptions of themselves as children have less likelihood of abusing their own (Herzog et al, 1992, p. 96), abusive mothers have distorted, negative perceptions of their child—ignoring them, initiating less play and less verbal contact, and being also critical, punitive, and demanding. Significantly, this kind of mother is likely to find it difficult to remember her own pain and humiliation as a child.…”