Narrative psychotherapy was developed to question traditional, essentialist, foundational epistemologies of clinical practice. However, the very practices it sought to take on may be sneaking in through the back door. Narrative however might escape historical tendencies of reification and dominance. In fact these tendencies are only a slight miscue in its development. Instead of succumbing to old habits of perfectability, or certainty, narrative can relax, and just learn to relate. This article presents three key points in this regard: concentrate on what is useful, work backwards from what people want to achieve and 'widen the circle'.