“Why Can't a Man Be More like a Woman?”: Marital Status and Social Networking of Older Men

Abstract

Research indicates older lone men have an elevated risk of social isolation, but there has been little recognition of the way in which marital histories lead to the growth or attenuation of family bonds. First analysed is data from General Household Survey, a national probability based cross-sectional survey, published annually, which included a module on social relationships in 1994 and 1998. Also, interviews with 85 older married, widowed, divorced and never married men revealed that much importance was attached to individual autonomy and independence, and many held ambivalent attitudes towards central features of the "female script," such as the need for intimacy and social engagement. These findings are interpreted in terms of the cultural prescriptions for well-being in later life that, because they are derived from the experiences of research on women, may be ill suited to the perspectives of older men.

"Ageism" in Brazil: what is it? who does it? what to do with it?

“…In most discourses one can be masculine and one can be old, but not both. As much as femininity has been a boundarydefining yardstick for what masculinity is not, for the past two centuries "old" has also been incorporated as a cultural gauge for what masculinity is not (KIMMEL, 1997;THOMPSON, 2004;DAVIDSON, 2004). Normative masculinity became and remains embodied by middle-aged and younger men, both in mass culture and in men's studies.…”

Men and loneliness in the ‘west’: A critical interpretive synthesis

“…Ten found a significantly larger difference in the prevalence of loneliness between single and married men than they did between single and married women (27,28,34,37,38,(51)(52)(53)(54)(55), and two also suggested that single men are lonelier than those in unmarried romantic relationships (51,56). The findings from seven qualitative studies further emphasised the particular importance of romantic relationships to men (40,42,46,(57)(58)(59)(60). As one man stated after the death of his wife, "all that intimacy goes and there is nothing to replace it" (59, p426).…”

“…Firstly, men did seem to consider a romantic partner the first, and primary, person for meaningful social interaction: 'we [men] do not talk like I'd talk with my wife' (46, p1252). Secondly, men's social networks were often found to be limited and dependent on their spouse (42,59,60). For instance, when discussing services aiming to alleviate loneliness, one man stated:…”

“…Nine of the 18 studies in table nine were qualitative studies exploring older men and loneliness (41,42,(58)(59)(60)(75)(76)(77)(78). Most of these acknowledged isolating life events such as widowhood, retirement, a loss of mobility (or other isolating health issue), and/or moving into specialist housing, to be more common with age (42,58,59,(75)(76)(77). They also constructed three suggestions for policy and practice.…”

Mixed Methods Study of Social Engagement in Assisted Living Communities: Challenges and Implications for Serving Older Men

“…Interestingly, men who relocated to an age-restricted, planned community reported gains in terms of finding persons to provide emotional, practical, and illness support, but women in the same setting reported no gains or losses (Waldron, Gitelson, & Kelley, 2005). Davidson (2004) noted that older men take their cues from their partners (wives or girlfriends) in social settings, but may resist forging intimate bonds because of stereotypical gender roles (i.e., being strong, dispensing advice and material help) to which they are accustomed. We argue that although older men want socialization opportunities and supportive networks, they deny their needs for emotional support because of gender identity and their perceptions of masculine roles.…”