Children of individuals under investigation for the possession of child sexual abuse material (CSAM) in the UK are referred to social work to assess the risk of potential sexual harm. As a result of their co-parent’s offences, the non-offending carer finds themselves thrown into the centre of child protection investigations and parenting assessments, which is underpinned by the new reality they must face: Their partner is no longer considered safe to be left alone with children. This study was undertaken over the course of two years as part of my participatory action research doctoral thesis in which I worked in collaboration with four women with lived experience of social work intervention. This article focuses specifically on four themes identified that spoke to the women’s experiences with social workers. The themes are presented as messages that participants wished to communicate to child protection practitioners and were titled by the participants as follows: ‘we are terrified’, ‘we are not the perpetrator’, ‘we are on our knees’ and ‘we want to work together to protect out children’. Following a summary of themes, this article goes on to discuss how social workers might better respond to families impacted by CSAM.