This article examines the care experiences of former looked‐after children from a residential care setting in South Africa. There is only limited research among care leavers in South Africa, and even less on their experiences of being in care. Six young adults who had been in residential care participated in individual and focus group interviews. The research was informed by Rogers' person‐centred approach. Two central themes emerged from the data, namely, experiences concerning the “I”—the self of the young person—and experiences concerning the “we”—the young person in relationship with her or his social environment. Within each of these themes, participants raised both positive and negative experiences, many of which continued to shape them well after leaving care. The findings emphasize the importance of the self‐in‐context and the need for childcare settings to strike a balance between the individual and communal needs of looked‐after children. These findings have implications both for child and youth care practice and for the management of child and youth care facilities.