Current metal nanomaterials for developing nanofunctional textiles are mostly based on metal nanoparticles (NPs) that show aqueous instability, a tendency to aggregate, and low chemical affinity to biomass textiles, leading to low nano-metal uptake during finishing, significant declines in function, and nano-pollution. Herein, we demonstrate a strategy to transform metal (Ag, Au, and Pt) NPs into homogenous hyperbranched poly(amide-amine) (HBPAA)-encapsulated NPs showing high water solubility, oxidative resistance, and affinity to biomass materials upon surface capping with HBPAA. The proposed method represents a universal, simple, clean, and efficient self-assembly technology to produce monolayered Ag–Au–Pt ternary-coated biomass textiles. The combination of Ag, Au, and Pt NPs yields a positive potential of approximately +37.12 mV depending on the metal concentration and could simultaneously self-assemble onto natural fibers, including cotton, silk, and wool, through the one-step impregnation of textiles. Increasing the temperature and concentration of the mixture favors the self-assembly process. A mixture of 30–110 mg/L Ag, Au, and Pt NPs could nearly completely anchor onto cotton, silk, and wool textiles after impregnation at 100 °C for 1 h without chemical assistance, thereby indicating the possibility of clean production. As-prepared functional cotton, silk, and wool possessed similarly high antibacterial activities, and a mixture containing over 1500 mg/g NPs inhibited 99% of the Escherichia coli and Staphylococcus aureus in the sample textiles. The developed coating technology is simple, clean, controllable, and broadly applicable; thus, it could be potentially applied in functional textiles.