Although personality characteristics figure prominently in what people want in a mate, little is known about precisely which personality characteristics are most important, whether men and women differ in their personality preferences, whether individual women or men differ in what they want, and whether individuals actually get what they want. To explore these issues, two parallel studies were conducted, one using a sample of dating couples (N = 118) and one using a sample of married couples (N = 216). The five-factor model, operationalized in adjectival form, was used to assess personality characteristics via three data sources-self--report, partner report, and independent interviewer reports. Participants evaluated on a parallel 40-item instrument their preferences for the ideal personality characteristics of their mates. Results were consistent across both studies. Women expressed a greater preference than men for a wide array of socially desirable personality traits. Individuals differed in which characteristics they desired, preferring mates who were similar to themselves and actually obtaining mates who embodied what they desired. Finally, the personality characteristics of one's partner significantly predicted marital and sexual dissatisfaction, most notably when the partner was lower on Agreeableness, Emotional Stability, and Intellect-Openness than desired.
We examined the correspondence between the structure of act-report data and 5-factor models emerging from trait-rating data. Twenty categories were selected as markers for the 5-factor model and retrospective act reports were constructed for the target categories: One hundred eighteen men and women comprising 59 dating couples completed self-based and observer-based act reports. Several factor analyses tested different assumptions. Retaining total act performance (TAP) produced a blend of the traditional 5 factors. Removing TAP closely reproduced the 5-factor model in both principal-components and procrustes analyses. Correlations between the derived act factors and trait ratings from 6 data sources support a reinterpretation of the traditional trait labels. Discussion focuses on the implications of different assumptions on the formulation of a basic model of personality structure. Identifying a basic set of individual differences has been a central concern of personality psychology for decades (
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