Blinded by Love

Dalessandro, Cristen; Wilkins, Amy C.

doi:10.1177/0891243216679121

Cited by 22 publications

(9 citation statements)

References 44 publications

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“…First, people learn from their past romantic experiences. Qualitative studies found that women and men reflect on their previous romantic relationships and describe them as experiences from which they learn and grow (Dalessandro & Wilkins, 2017). Housework is a source of discord and conflict in relationships that matters for women's satisfaction (Hu & Yucel, 2017) and couples' frequency and satisfaction from sexual intimacy (Carlson et al, 2016).…”

Section: Theory and Hypothesesmentioning

confidence: 99%

“Thank u, next”? Repartnering and the household division of labor

Ophir

2021

J of Marriage and Family

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Objective Drawing on life course and gender theories, this study tests competing hypotheses about the effect of repartnering on women's and men's levels and shares of housework. Background Amidst increasing cohabitation rates and union instability, women and men are likely to form and dissolve multiple marital and nonmarital unions with different partners over the life course. However, most of our knowledge about the role of past relationships are based on cross‐sectional studies comparing first‐ and higher‐order union. This study investigates whether people change their housework arrangements upon repartnering and whether women and men experience similar patterns of change in heterosexual relationships. Method The analysis draws on 40 years of longitudinal data from the Panel Study of Income Dynamics and a sample of 1897 women and men who were observed in two sequential heterosexual unions. The author used fixed effects models to estimate change in housework behavior upon repartnering. Results Overall, the results show stability in housework behavior upon repartnering once controlling for other life course changes that concur with repartnering. Women continued doing the majority of housework upon repartnering. Conclusion The results suggest that forming a new heterosexual union evokes gender scripts which overall maintains the gendered housework behavior. Although housework is dynamic over the life course, the gender dynamics that shape housework is stable amid union instability.

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Section: Theory and Hypothesesmentioning

confidence: 99%

“Thank u, next”? Repartnering and the household division of labor

Ophir

2021

J of Marriage and Family

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“…Being in a romantic relationship gives individuals a social role as a romantic partner, as well as the possibility to see themselves in the eyes of their partner and gain a new perspective on who they are (Arnett, 2014; Montgomery, 2005). Few studies have conducted qualitative investigations into experiences of romantic relationships, and those that have done so have shed light on how early adults perceive that romantic relationships should be and how they handle normative romantic experiences (e.g., Wängqvist, Carlsson, van der Lee & Frisén, 2016; Dalessandro & Wilkens, 2017). In this study, we took a different perspective, exploring experiences of romantic relationships among individuals who go against the relational norm by not regarding their romantic partner as the most important person to them when they need love and support.…”

Section: Introductionmentioning

confidence: 99%

Experiences of romantic relationships among early adults who do not turn to their long‐term partner when in need of love and support

Järdmo

Frisén

Wängqvist

2022

Scandinavian J Psychology

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As most early adults in long‐term romantic relationships rely on their partner to fulfill their relational needs, relationships with romantic partners are very important to many people at this time of life. However, there is a group of individuals for whom their long‐term partner is not the most important person when they need love and support. This study explored experiences of romantic relationships among early adults who do not turn to their long‐term partner to meet these needs. Twelve individuals in early adulthood (Mage = 33.3 years; SD = 0.54) were selected from a larger community sample (N = 124) based on their answers on a questionnaire about who they turn to when in need of love and support. A thematic analysis of their answers in interviews about romantic relationships resulted in three main themes: Distancing attitudes toward romantic relationships, Desirable aspects of romantic relationships, and Not thinking about romantic relationships. The results show that these early adults' reflections on romantic relationships were characterized by ambivalence, striving toward independence, and relating to their partner as a person to have fun with rather than someone to share a deep connection with. Participants also expressed disagreement with what they perceived as norms concerning romantic relationships. Taken together, this study illustrates that the experiences of early adults who do not turn to their long‐term partner to meet needs of love and support are characterized by a complex interaction between contradictory feelings, values, and behaviors.

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“…Research shows that in their own lives and relationships, US-based millennials—young adults born between 1981–1996 who are the first full generation to be raised after the conclusion of the second wave feminist movement—tend to value gender equity (GenForward, 2018; Risman, 2018). However, some research finds that millennials still struggle to achieve their equity goals in the context of intimacy (Dalessandro & Wilkins, 2017). One aspect of intimate life that is seemingly a continued source of gendered struggle is parenting.…”

Section: Introductionmentioning

confidence: 99%

“…However, some work has found that millennials’ views and opinions on gender equity are actually variable and inconsistent despite millennials’ progressive reputation (Risman, 2018). Further, research on younger adults’ intimate and sexual relationship lives demonstrate pervasive gender issues and inequalities (Dalessandro & Wilkins, 2017; Dernberger & Pepin, 2020; Hamilton & Armstrong, 2009; Lamont, 2013). Thus, it is unclear how millennials fully negotiate parenting expectations in light of the persistent gender expectations that continue to pervade their lives.…”

Section: Introductionmentioning

confidence: 99%

“…Millennials’ stories about their experiences with parents—gathered in an interview setting—help illustrate how millennials are thinking about parenting, gender, and the potential gendering of parenting expectations. While interview accounts can be a site of meaning-making and social construction (Dalessandro & Wilkins, 2017; Mason-Schrock, 1996), culture and larger ideologies inform constructions that are affirmed in the interview setting. Thus, while interviews are useful for observing how individuals make sense of their lives and assign meaning to the events in their lives, interviews are also a window into how individuals are thinking about some social phenomena at a given point in historical time.…”

Section: Introductionmentioning

confidence: 99%

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“She Took Care of Us and She Went Through a Lot”: Emotional Availability, Emotional Support, and Millennials’ Gendered Understandings of Parenting

Dalessandro

2021

Journal of Family Issues

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In the United States, parenting pressures are growing for both mothers and fathers. Thus, it is important to investigate how younger generations may make sense of parenting in ways that could either reduce, or exacerbate, gender inequalities. In this article, interviews with 60 millennials discussing their experiences with their parents reveal that emotional support and emotional availability are key normative parenting expectations. However, disparate gender norms also factor into millennials’ stories about their parents’ efforts. These millennials often criticize fathers for sometimes being too absent, authoritarian, or ego-driven while they understand mothers as constrained by fathers’ bad behaviors yet still bound by expectations to be emotionally available and supportive in appropriately gendered ways. In millennials’ stories, emotional support and availability are seemingly gender neutral and millennials expect both fathers and mothers to live up to these expectations. However, broader structural gender norms challenge the apparent neutrality of parenting expectations.

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Blinded by Love

Cited by 22 publications

References 44 publications

“Thank u, next”? Repartnering and the household division of labor

“Thank u, next”? Repartnering and the household division of labor

Experiences of romantic relationships among early adults who do not turn to their long‐term partner when in need of love and support

“She Took Care of Us and She Went Through a Lot”: Emotional Availability, Emotional Support, and Millennials’ Gendered Understandings of Parenting

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