We present new SINFONI near-infrared integral field unit (IFU) spectroscopy and SALT optical long-slit spectroscopy characterising the history of a nearby merging luminous infrared galaxy, dubbed the Bird (IRAS19115-2114). The NIR line-ratio maps of the IFU data-cubes and stellar population fitting of the SALT spectra now allow dating of the star formation (SF) over the triple system uncovered from our previous adaptive optics data. The distinct components separate very clearly in a line-ratio diagnostic diagram. An off-nuclear pure starburst dominates the current SF of the Bird with 60-70% of the total, with a 4-7 Myr age, and signs of a fairly constant long-term star formation of the underlying stellar population. The most massive nucleus, in contrast, is quenched with a starburst age of > 40 Myr and shows hints of budding AGN activity. The secondary massive nucleus is at an intermediate stage. The two major components have a population of older stars, consistent with a starburst triggered 1 Gyr ago in a first encounter. The simplest explanation of the history is that of a triple merger, where the strongly star forming component has joined later. We detect multiple gas flows in different phases. The Bird offers an opportunity to witness multiple stages of galaxy evolution in the same system; triggering as well as quenching of SF, and the early appearance of AGN activity. It also serves as a cautionary note on interpretations of observations with lower spatial resolution and/or without infrared data. At high-redshift the system would look like a clumpy starburst with crucial pieces of its puzzle hidden, in danger of misinterpretations.