Growing up in the Netherlands means growing up in a country with a strong domestic tradition, which is anchored both in the institutions of the welfare state and in the mentality of the people. In the 21st century, however, this condition hampers the adjustment to changes in family relations and in society at large. One implication is the ambiguous position of children, hanging between the private and the public domain, implying specific tensions and dilemmas. Two issues are significant: the division of responsibility for children between parents and collective institutions; and the search of parents and other educators — peers included — to find a balance between external social control and self-control in the formation of the personality of children. Dutch sociological research on children and childhood is scarce and fragmentary, which may be linked to the ambiguous social position of contemporary Dutch children.