This study explores the way minority ethnic youth in the Netherlands evaluate their sexual experiences, how they frame these experiences in different sexual discourses and how they deal with conflicts between different sexual discourses, both at home and in Dutch society. During 46 narrative interviews, Dutch young people (aged 12-22 years) from different minority ethnic communities shared their sexual histories and their dreams for the future relating to love and sexuality. Different sexual discourses can be identified in the language they used to describe their ideas and their experiences. Young people grow up with a variety of discourses but actively re-shape them according to circumstances and need. In many cases, young people experience a conflict between the discourses of the home and those that are prevalent more generally in Dutch society. Young people's ways of negotiating these contradictory discourses comprise four main strategies: (1) conforming to parents' values, (2) breaking up with parents, (3) leading a double life and (4) integrating competing discourses. By bringing together different sexual discourses and acknowledging diverse strategies, sexual health policies can become more effective in promoting sexual health for minority ethnic youth. Findings from the study add fuel to debate on understanding (sexual) agency among young people, exhibiting the social 'embeddedness' of individual agency.