Mutual and unrequited love in adolescence and young adulthood

Abstract

The purpose of the study was to examine the frequency of experiencing passionate love during adolescence and young adulthood as recalled by young adults, and to examine gender differences in this frequency. Female and male US. introductory psychology students, several of whom were of nontraditional age, responded to a questionnaire that asked about the frequency of their mutual and unrequited love experiences. Respondents provided information for four age periods ranging from childhood to age 25 years. Although the frequency of recalled mutual love experiences increased for both genders from childhood through the 16‐to‐20‐year‐age period, men reported more episodes or unrequited love during the 16‐to‐20‐year‐age period compared to (a) other age periods, (b) their reports of mutual love during that age period, and (c) the reports of unrequited love for 16‐to‐20‐year‐old women.

The Prevalence and Nature of Unrequited Love

“…This suggests that lust, infatuation, and crushes (Shaver et al, 1996) are generalized responses that can be easily evoked by a sizable portion of potential romantic partners. Consistent with this, the type of UL with the highest prevalence was having romantic feelings for someone nearby (Hill et al, 1997). This is consistent with Lykken and Tellegen's contention that adolescence may be a critical period predisposed toward infatuation, which produces a wide array of internal responses (sexual fantasies, behavioral intentions) and external responses (glances, conversations, propositions, proposals).…”

“…Hill et al (1997) also reported the highest frequency of UL for the 16-to 20-year age group. One explanation for the higher frequency in the current research is that equal love is more enduring than UL.…”

Unrequited Love

“…In fact, unrequited love appears to be a fairly common experience. Hill et al (1997) found that most people surveyed reported such experiences several times over the course of adolescence and young adulthood. How do unrequited love experiences come about if they are so common?…”

“…Age Researchers examined differences in unrequited love in childhood, adolescence, and young adulthood (Hill et al 1997). They found that the amount of unrequited love experiences increased from children younger than 10 to those between the ages of 10 and 15, culminating in a peak in these experiences between the range of 16 and 20 years old, and lastly decreasing during 21-25 years of age.…”

Stalkers : what are they thinking?

“…Even though there is no gender difference in the engagement of pursuit behavior, women are twice as likely as men to be victims, and men are three times as likely to pursue than women (Spitzberg et al, 2010). Men have also been shown to experience rejection, or unrequited love, more often than women, especially during the young adult/late adolescent years, which is often a motive for persistent pursuit (Hill, Blakemore, & Drumm, 1997). Women are much more likely to be victims of stalking behavior by men, so in order to provide focus, this study will target stalking relationships where women are the target and men are behaving in ways that make the women feel stalked.…”