Psychologically Adjusted Persons Are Less Aware of How They Are Perceived by Others

Abstract

Focusing on individual differences, we studied three influences on the accuracy of meta-perceptions of personality: (a) projection, that is, relying on one's self-perception; (b) normative meta-insight, that is, relying on the perception of the typical person by others; and (c) distinctive meta-insight, that is, relying on others' perception of one's unique personality attributes. Using a round-robin design, 52 groups of four acquainted students described themselves, three acquaintances, and their meta-perceptions on the Big-Five factors of personality, and provided self-reports of psychological adjustment. Projection, normative, and distinctive meta-insight contributed uniquely to meta-perception, yet qualified by systematic individual differences: Psychologically adjusted meta-perceivers projected more and relied on distinctive meta-insight less. Moreover, acquaintance raised projection. Thus, psychologically adjusted meta-perceivers were less aware of discrepancies between their self-perceptions and their actual perceptions by others, and the better people knew another person, the more strongly they expected that this other person perceived them like they perceived themselves.

Blissfully Blind or Painfully Aware? Exploring the Beliefs People With Interpersonal Problems Have About Their Reputation

“…Thus, rather than being blind to their effect on others, people with distress were acutely aware once they were acquainted. Evidence for the Painfully Aware Hypothesis is in line with a recent finding by Mosch and Borkenau (), who showed that people with higher self‐esteem were less aware of how they were seen by peers. They argued that such a pattern suggests positive affect interferes with analytic processing, a skill that might be necessary for detecting the impressions one makes.…”

“…Yet, people with more psychopathology symptoms tend to see themselves differently than others see them (Clifton, Turkheimer, & Oltmanns, ; Mosterman & Hendriks, ), suggesting that self‐perceptions probably hinder rather than foster their accuracy. Interestingly, most people are able to make valid distinctions between how they see themselves and how others perceive them, an ability called meta‐insight (Carlson, Vazire, & Furr, ; Gallrein, Carlson, Holstein, & Leising, ; Mosch & Borkenau, ; Oltmanns, Gleason, Klonsky, & Turkheimer, ). Thus, people can effectively use sources of information other than their self‐perceptions to infer the impression they make (e.g., feedback).…”

“…For example, people with higher distinctive meta‐accuracy for a new acquaintance reported less liking for that acquaintance (Carlson, ), suggesting that Meg's insight into what makes her distinctive in Jon's eyes can be aversive. Likewise, people who reported higher self‐esteem and fewer personality disorder symptoms had less meta‐insight for peers (Mosch & Borkenau, ), suggesting that if Meg has lower self‐esteem or more personality disorder symptoms, she likely has more meta‐insight. Thus, the Painfully Aware Hypothesis posits that awareness is higher among people with interpersonal problems and suggests that their awareness about what makes them distinctive to others and their keen insight into how others experience them differently from how they see themselves might exacerbate their problems.…”

“…Indeed, one explanation for the mixed effects of awareness is that problems were self‐reported. Most evidence suggesting that meta‐accuracy is adaptive comes from work assessing judges’ reports of outcomes (e.g., Jon's relationship quality with Meg, Jon's perceptions of Meg's adjustment), but metaperceiver‐reported outcomes often show no link or are negatively associated with accuracy (Carlson, , ; Mosch & Borkenau, ). That is, Meg's meta‐accuracy is either unrelated to her self‐esteem and how she feels about Jon or predicts her liking Jon or herself less.…”

Toward understanding understanding: The importance of feeling understood in relationships

“…Kenny and DePaulo's () more recent review extended this conclusion. Although people are reasonably accurate at discerning how they are viewed in general, they are poor at detecting differences in how they are viewed by specific others (called distinctive meta‐insight by Mosch & Borkenau, ). Thus, the common tendency to perceive that others understand oneself, reflected in convergence between perceivers' self‐views and reflected appraisals, may exaggerate, and perhaps correlate only minimally with, specific others' actual understanding.…”