In this paper, we describe a novel, model-independent technique of "rectangular aggregations" for mining the LHC data for hints of new physics. A typical (CMS) search now has hundreds of signal regions, which can obscure potentially interesting anomalies. Applying our technique to the two CMS jets+MET SUSY searches, we identify a set of previously overlooked ∼ 3σ excesses. Among these, four excesses survive tests of inter-and intra-search compatibility, and two are especially interesting: they are largely overlapping between the jets+MET searches and are characterized by low jet multiplicity, zero b-jets, and low MET and H T . We find that resonant color-triplet production decaying to a quark plus an invisible particle provides an excellent fit to these two excesses and all other data -including the ATLAS jets+MET search, which actually sees a correlated excess. We discuss the additional constraints coming from dijet resonance searches, monojet searches and pair production. Based on these results, we believe the wide-spread view that the LHC data contains no interesting excesses is greatly exaggerated.