A prior meta-analysis yielded a positive relation between self-enhancement and psychological health. This article presents the first meta-analysis of the association between self-enhancement and physical health (k = 87; N = 22,415). The meta-analysis relied predominantly on social desirability as an operationalization of self-enhancement and secondarily on comparative judgement and narcissism. Further, the meta-analysis operationalized physical health in terms of self-rated health, symptoms and biomarkers. Overall, self-enhancement yielded a near-zero association with physical health, r = .01. However, this association was more pronounced for comparative judgement (r = .18, k = 6) than social desirability (r = .03, k = 41) or narcissism (r = −.0001, k = 8), and for self-rated health (r = .09, k = 9) than symptoms (r = .01, k = 29) or biomarkers (r = −.13, k = 17). The association between self-enhancement and physical health fluctuates across measures of both constructs calling for more focussed and nuanced investigations.