‘Utterly Heart-Breaking and Devastating’: Couple Relationships and Intensive Parenting Culture in a Time of ‘Cold Intimacies’

Faircloth, Charlotte

doi:10.1007/978-3-030-29256-0_11

Cited by 8 publications

(4 citation statements)

References 27 publications

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“…In their study drawing on Swedish data regarding housework and rates of divorce, Ruppanner et al (2018) make the important point that it is not the unequal division of labour between couples per se which causes conflict, rather it is the lack of recognition with regard to that inequality which leads to lower relationship satisfaction. This clearly also chimes with work by Illouz on the 'cooling' of intimate life, and a more contractual approach to personal relationships (Illouz, 2007;Faircloth, 2020).…”

Section: Cultural Barriers: the Intensive Motherhood And The 'Mental ...supporting

confidence: 61%

When equal partners become unequal parents: couple relationships and intensive parenting culture

Faircloth

2021

Families, Relationships and Societies

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Based on longitudinal research with (heterosexual) couples in the UK, this article tracks their experiences of becoming parents for the first time. The suggestion is that new parents are caught in an uncomfortable confluence between competing discourses around ideal relationships and those around ideal parenting. On the one hand, they must be committed to egalitarian ideals about the division of care. On the other, they must be parenting ‘intensively’, in ways which are markedly more demanding for mothers, and which makes paternal involvement more complicated.<br />Drawing on accounts of relationship difficulties, elicited over a five-year period, the article demonstrates the incommensurability of these ideals at physiological, material and ideological levels. As a contribution to the body of work known as parenting culture studies, this article brings, for the first time, an empirical focus to the question of how an ‘intensive’ parenting culture affects couples, rather than just mothers or fathers.

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Section: Cultural Barriers: the Intensive Motherhood And The 'Mental ...supporting

confidence: 61%

When equal partners become unequal parents: couple relationships and intensive parenting culture

Faircloth

2021

Families, Relationships and Societies

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“…However, given the known association between maternal and paternal mental ill-health (Edward et al, 2015;Glasser & Lerner-Geva, 2019;Paulson & Bazemore, 2010), this could challenge the wellbeing of both parents. The quality of the couple relationship therefore becomes even more important at a time when it is under immense pressure (Faircloth, 2020).…”

Section: Discussionmentioning

confidence: 99%

A qualitative exploration of how extended paternity leave can promote fathers’ psychological wellbeing

Hobbs

2024

Intnl. J. Wellbeing

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The perinatal period is known to be a vulnerable time for parents’ mental health and wellbeing. Research about fathers’ health during this time is in its infancy and has focused predominantly on mental health problems. Much less is known about how fathers experience their own wellbeing or what can help their lives (and consequently the lives of their family) to go well during the significant event of having a baby. Early research suggests that allowing fathers to take a longer period of paternity leave could help to promote their wellbeing. The aim of this study was therefore to explore the experiences of some of the first fathers to take extended paternity leave following the UK’s introduction of its new Shared Parental Leave policy in 2015. Semi-structured interviews were conducted with sixteen fathers from around the UK who were employed in a variety of industries. The sample included both first-time fathers and those extending their family. Template Analysis was initially used to systematically analyse the data. The overarching conclusion was that the wellbeing of these fathers appeared to flourish during a major life event that has a known association with mental health problems for many fathers. To seek an explanation for this, the findings were interpreted using a novel approach based on the theoretical framework of Ryff’s (1989) six aspects of psychological wellbeing. A conceptual model is therefore proposed that suggests extended paternity leave can promote fathers’ psychological wellbeing by allowing them a rare and valuable opportunity for self-reflection, personal growth, development of parental mastery, and to support the wellbeing of their family. This qualitative exploration contributes a deep understanding of the nature of these fathers’ individual experiences of their own psychological wellbeing. The potential of extended paternity leave for promoting the wellbeing of fathers and their families during the critical postnatal period signals that there may be value in researching the relationship between paternal leave and wellbeing further.

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“…On the other hand, in recent decades, the expectations regarding these roles have increased. Some authors have posed the growing predominance of what they have called “ideology of intensive parenting” to refer to a conception of the maternal and paternal exercise of total commitment and dedication to the children, which would set disproportionate standards of what being a good parent would imply, increasing the feelings of guilt, failure, and self-demand [ 12 , 52 ].…”

Section: Discussionmentioning

confidence: 99%

“…However, the current social context may conspire, on some levels, against the subjective well-being of those who are parents, an issue that is not always visible. In fact, parenthood is often idealized in social discourses, while the difficulties associated with the experience are minimized [ 11 , 12 , 13 ]. In fact, several investigations have indicated the existence of a personal well-being gap between those who are parents with respect to those who are not, which has been the subject of interest and controversy [ 14 , 15 , 16 ].…”

Section: Introductionmentioning

confidence: 99%

Subjective Well-Being and Parenthood in Chile

Novoa

Bustos

Bühring

et al. 2021

IJERPH

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Being a parent plays an important role in people’s life trajectory and identity. Though the general cultural perception is that having children is a source of subjective well-being, there is evidence that, at least in some societies, the subjective well-being of those who are parents is worse, in some aspects, than that of those who are not. This gap has been the object of interest and controversy. The aim of this study was to compare Chilean adults with and without children in a broad set of well-being indicators, controlling for other sociodemographic variables. A public national probabilistic database was used. The results show that, in terms of positive and negative affect, those who are not parents achieve greater well-being than those who have children. Other results also pointed in that direction. The implications of the social context and gender, which are aspects that pose a burden for the exercise of parenthood in Chile, are discussed.

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‘Utterly Heart-Breaking and Devastating’: Couple Relationships and Intensive Parenting Culture in a Time of ‘Cold Intimacies’

Cited by 8 publications

References 27 publications

When equal partners become unequal parents: couple relationships and intensive parenting culture

When equal partners become unequal parents: couple relationships and intensive parenting culture

A qualitative exploration of how extended paternity leave can promote fathers’ psychological wellbeing

Subjective Well-Being and Parenthood in Chile

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