You make all things special: Developing a scale to measure sympathetic magic in romantic relationships

Abstract

This paper describes the development and construct validation of the Romantic Sympathetic Magic Scale (RSMS). The scale measures individual differences in directing attachment behavior toward inanimate objects associated with one's partner. We offer a theoretical basis for such behavior in the concept of sympathetic magic and test the motivational and cognitive factors involved in this tendency. Finally, we differentiate romantic sympathetic magic from similar concepts. Three studies (N = 851) showed that RSMS is related to increased experientiality as well as to motivation to increase closeness to one's partner. The RSMS is related to, but substantially different from, paranormal beliefs, anthropomorphism for gadgets, and an overall attachment to inanimate objects. The distinctive feature of romantic sympathetic magic is that it applies specifically to objects associated with people's loved ones and its function is to facilitate a perceived connection with them. This research contributes to our understanding of the correspondence between personal relationships and emotional connection to inanimate objects.Keywords romantic relationship . sympathetic magic . inanimate object . keepsake . individual differencesThe closer our relationships are with objects, the closer our relationships are with people.Daniel Miller (2008, p. 1)What can we learn about an individual from his or her relationship to material possessions? To answer this question, anthropologists-Daniel Miller and Fiona Parrot (Miller 2008)-interviewed residents of a random street in South London, analyzing how belongings reflect the personality and life history of their owners. As a result, the authors created portraits of people whose relationships to things varied widely: from complete detachment, through instrumental use of artifacts, to one noticeable instance of a profound and intimate attachment of an owner to his or her cherished possession. To some people, inanimate objects such as photographs, jewelry, clothes, and family keepsakes are much more than mere representations or recollections of their loved ones. Symptomatically, Miller (2008) observed that the closer the connection between people, the closer the relationship to objects associated with those people. Yet, in psychology, there is surprisingly little empirical support for this effect. Recent studies have even demonstrated the opposite, showing that the more people's loved ones are unreliable and disappointing, the more their attachment is redirected toward inanimate objects (Keefer et al. 2012;Pieters 2013). This paper aims to provide a theoretical and empirical understanding of the processes involved in attachment to inanimate objects that parallels the maintenance of closeness in social relationships.We propose that the sympathetic magical thinking (Frazer 1925;Rozin and Nemeroff 2002) involved in the perception of inanimate objects associated with one's romantic partner elicits a sense that these objects contain some qualities of the partner. Thus, the more people need to ...

When do keepsakes keep us together? The effect of separation from a partner on directing attachment to inanimate objects

“…On the other hand, chronic attempts to distance oneself in distressing situations of intimacy observed in avoidant attachment orientation (Mikulincer et al, ) were negatively related to attachment to inanimate objects associated with one's partner. These correlations have been replicated in several studies (Niemyjska, Gieszczyk, Markowska, & Pajączkowska, , Study 1–3; Niemyjska & Parzuchowski, , Study 1–3).…”

“…Indeed, Wildschut et al (, Study 7) showed that nostalgia increases a general sense of one's social competence (i.e., initiation of social relationships, self‐disclosure, and providing emotional support to others). I would not expect that attachment to inanimate objects affects the evaluation of one's social competence in general, but it might increase the perceived quality of a specific relationship (e.g., with one's romantic partner; Niemyjska & Parzuchowski, ).…”

“…In contrast to the Romantic Magical Thinking Scale used in the previous study, this measure detects nothing more than behavioral indices of magical intuitions, and it clearly resembles the measure of sympathetic magic used in Study 1. However, similar to the measure used in Study 2, it refers to a wide range of artifacts, and the scale has been validated in previous studies (Niemyjska & Parzuchowski, ). The RSMS includes items such as “Sometimes I say something to a photograph of my partner” and “I like to cuddle up with my partner's clothes.” Participants rated the extent to which each statement was characteristic of them on a 5‐point scale ranging from 1 ( strongly disagree ) to 5 ( strongly agree ).…”

“…One of the benefits of sympathetic magic‐guided perception of inanimate objects might be providing feelings of immediacy with another. Niemyjska and Parzuchowski () showed that coupled adults who directed their attachment behavior to inanimate objects associated with their romantic partner reported increased feelings of relationship closeness (Dibble, Levine, & Park, ), as well as an increased perception of interconnectedness with the partner (Aron, Aron, & Smollan, ). Likewise, it was found that sympathetic magic in the perception of material objects associated with a partner can regulate feelings of safety by increasing the sense of closeness to that partner (Niemyjska, ).…”

“…Importantly, as described above, sympathetic magic is a subset of heuristics (Bower, Peynircio glu, & Rabinovitz, 2018;Rozin & Nemeroff, 2002) that offers an understanding of how certain inanimate objects become motivation-relevant. Moreover, there is some evidence that motivation to seek closeness to a loved one fosters a perception of artifacts associated with him or her in line with the heuristics of similarity and contagion (Arthern & Madill, 1999;Niemyjska, 2015;Niemyjska & Parzuchowski, 2018;Parrott, 2010;Riches & Dawson, 1998).…”