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The links between social constructions of sexuality and gender are theoretically and politically problematic. A contemporary social movement understanding of violence against gay men and lesbians as ‘homophobic’ suggests a solid basis for coalitionist action. But important aspects of the imposition of gender conformity are a common thread in the experience of female, male and transsexual victims and the motives of perpetrators. Detail of violent and hostile incidents is drawn from two Australian studies: Victorian research on the experiences of 75 lesbians and a New South Wales study of 74 homicides with anti-homosexual motives. Violent acts commonly reflect the hatred and stigma felt towards women and men whose sexuality falls outside of acceptable gendered boundaries. Additionally, this research signals the importance of violence and harassment for the attainment and protection of a masculine identity among perpetrators, and the significance of gender in ways that call for a new understanding of ‘homophobia’ as a socially widespread phenomenon.