In this article, we propose the vulnerability cycle as a construct for understanding and working with couples' impasses. We expand the interactional concept of couples' reciprocal patterns to include behavioral and subjective dimensions, and articulate specific processes that trigger and maintain couples' entanglements. We consider the vulnerability cycle as a nexus of integration in which "vulnerabilities" and "survival positions" are key ideas that bring together interactional, sociocultural, intrapsychic, and intergenerational levels of meaning and process. The vulnerability cycle diagram is presented as a tool for organizing information. We suggest a therapeutic approach for deconstructing couples' impasses and facilitating new patterns through deliberate modes of questioning, a freeze-frame technique, stimulation of calmness and reflection, separating present from past, and elicitation of alternative meanings, behaviors, empathy, and choice. This approach encourages the therapist and couple to work collaboratively in promoting change and resilience.

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This article describes an organizational/interactional model for understanding and working with graduate student marriages. The model first distinguishes symmetrical (student/student) from asymmetrical (student/working spouse) marriages. Then, the major focus is on asymmetrical marriages and the disengagement process that is typical among these couples. Asymmetrical organization, especially within today's ethos of equal roles and equal responsibilities, presents graduate student couples with several dilemmas: (a) it promotes hierarchical confusion, (b) it makes for a problematic marital quid pro quo, and (c) it fosters contextual gaps between the two partners. When these inherent difficulties are misconstrued and mishandled, dysfunctional sequences lead the couple into progressive disengagement. Even as dissatisfaction in the marriage increases, graduate student couples have a tendency to postpone and suspend negotiations. Over time, there is an intensification of the couple's unhappiness but, at the same time, the relationship remains structurally unchanged. The building tension in the marriage typically culminates in a crisis when a milestone in the student's course of work precipitates a major disorganization of the system. Clinical implications of the model are outlined with recommendations for focused interventions.

Jealousy is a powerful emotional force in couples' relationships. In just seconds it can turn love into rage and tenderness into acts of control, intimidation, and even suicide or murder. Yet it has been surprisingly neglected in the couples therapy field. In this paper we define jealousy broadly as a hub of contradictory feelings, thoughts, beliefs, actions, and reactions, and consider how it can range from a normative predicament to extreme obsessive manifestations. We ground jealousy in couples' basic relational tasks and utilize the construct of the vulnerability cycle to describe processes of derailment. We offer guidelines on how to contain the couple's escalation, disarm their ineffective strategies and power struggles, identify underlying vulnerabilities and yearnings, and distinguish meanings that belong to the present from those that belong to the past, or to other contexts. The goal is to facilitate relational and personal changes that can yield a better fit between the partners' expectations.